Leftover Week and Forbidden Fruit

Ok y'all, check me out:



So my shopping list this week included the following:

Greens
Kefir
Blueberries
Bananas
Apples
Honeydew melon
Pineapple
Peaches
Strawberries

And I think that's it! Somehow, despite my best efforts, Ben and Jerry did weasel their way on there at the last second. Those mothers are sneaky, ya gotta watch out.

Ok, I have to admit I was a bit skeptical when I pulled a block o' frozen tupperware out of my freezer and realized I was supposed to eat it the next day. I thought - really? How good can this stuff be when it's all defrosted and stuff?

Answer: awesome. I had the chicken and chard soup from week one at lunch today and it was as good as the day I made it. For serious. Hello awesomeness - every 2 - 3 weeks I get to do ZERO cooking. I actually might STILL have some stuff leftover at the end of this week! We'll see. For dinner I had a cilantro turkey patty and rice, with greens and pineapple. I ended up reversing the order of the apple and pineapple due to laziness and lack of preparation last night. Whatevs.

I have been taking 400 mg of magnesium between 8 and 10 PM every night and I am no longer hounded by chocolate cravings. However I do still get a hankering for sugar and for ice cream from time to time. I think that's more of a mental thing than a legitimate message from my body, though. I had the ultimate challenge this weekend, which I failed miserably:

I have been taking a 7 week long class through the University of Washington's Extension program. It's on Saturday mornings, and we had our last class this weekend. I mentioned the sugar cravings before - one of the things I love most in this world is fluffy, 100% fake, super sugary CAKE FROSTING. This is bad for the obvious reasons, but also because FROSTING usually implies CAKE which implies WHEAT. Which my intestines HATE, if you've been reading along.

Ironically, what does my instructor walk through the door with at 9:00 AM in the freaking morning? CUPCAKES. Cupcakes with MILES of frosting on top.

Friends, I felt like such a little kid at this point. I COULD NOT THINK OF ANYTHING BUT THOSE GOD FORSAKEN CUPCAKES FOR THE REST OF CLASS. Am I a freaking five year old??? I was having a war with myself. I was probably just sitting there trembling and staring off into space the whole time. We usually have a break about half way through, and I managed to resist until then. At that point I had convinced myself (get ready for this, it's a good one) I had convinced myself that it would be OK to take a cupcake and LICK THE FROSTING OFF. Good compromise, right? All sugar, no wheat? Riiight. So my friends, I confess to you I have no shame. At break time I took a cupcake and bolted for my car, and sat in my car and ate the frosting off this sad little cupcake. But of course I managed to like, knick the top of it with my teeth at which point it was ALL OVER AND I JUST ATE THE GOD DAMN THING. Uuuughhh I hate myself!

So then I drove to Starbucks, hoping that they might, just might have a gluten-free pastry that would save me from this slippery slope (cause once you have one you might as well HAVE ANOTHER). Of course the place was packed, and I only had 10 minutes or so. But lo! There behind the glass counter was an orange almond something or other that was GLUTEN FREE! Woo-hoo! I happily waited and proudly told the clerk that I would like one of THOSE, thanks so much, and...

wait for it...

Dippie McDoodlepants the barista looks at me with mock sympathy and whines "Like, sorreeee, I think we're all out, we don't HAVE any."

I almost punched her in the face. No, not really. I DID however almost point to the display pastry and say "Well then what about that one?!? Why can't I just have that one???"

::sigh:: Ladies and gentlemen, this is what happens when you don't eat breakfast. Let the record show that I DID have another cupcake, thank you VERY much, and it was delicious but disappointingly fleeting and now I can't poop.

Let that be a lesson to you.