Vacation Mode

Hello hello. I'm a day late, I know. This has been a week of impromptu trips. I took a weekend trip to Port Angeles last weekend, staying in a cabin on the lake for a couple nights, and this Thursday evening I've decided to fly out to Michigan to see my Grandparents. They've both had recent health issues and I haven't seen them since October or so. I had been saving all my vacation because I was supposed to be getting married this summer, but maybe it's just as well things didn't work out that way. My grandparents won't be able to travel anytime soon.



So, I decided...what the hell. I miss my family. I miss taking vacations and having fun. So that's what I did this weekend.

Now, regarding my nutrition:

I was doing ok last week when I packed for the cabin trip. I brought fruit and trail mix with me, some popcorn and gluten free crackers. I'm not so much concerned with scrutinizing my nutrition on vacations and weekends, but I AM concerned about my consumption of wheat, especially when traveling.

For those of you with food allergies, you can probably relate. It's easy enough for me to avoid wheat when I am on a schedule and a routine. If I have my meals ready go to, bring my lunch to work, and even when I eat out at restaurants, I'm usually just fine. Avoiding wheat isn't actually all that hard once you know what to look for.



What kills me, however, is being trapped in a small cabin with folks who are very lovely people, but don't understand my allergy. Now, let me clarify: I never expect random strangers to understand such things, but I do hope that my friends, family, and closer coworkers do understand. The most frustrating thing in the world is having to explain, over and over again, that I REALLY CAN'T have "just one brownie", because doing so will destroy my intestines. Yes, so will pasta. Yes, so will pizza. YES, SO WILL A DONUT. GOD DAMMIT WHAT DON'T YOU GET??? I get a little testy about it because I LOVE these foods and I miss them so much. What inevitably happens over a weekend like this is that I cave under the torture. I am surrounded by things I can't eat, constantly offered these things by people who don't understand that my refusal to eat them is NOT out of vanity or dieting...and finally, I give up. Screw it. I want a brownie. Sure. What the hell.

And that's exactly what happened. It started with a small piece of cake (I love cake). I figured that small indulgence wouldn't really set me back too far. Then I discovered that the peanuts I'd been snacking on that I thought were "safe" were covered in some sort of gluten coating. Then I had a piece of brownie. A pretzel. By this point my abdomen was starting to swell and I was starting to feel sluggish and really grumpy, mostly out of disappointment in myself but also feeling misunderstood. I know that gluten intolerance / celiac disease is a new concept for a lot of people but ugh. Do I EVER get sick of explaining it...over and over and over. I have a sneaking suspicion that a lot of people don't really believe I have an allergy to wheat. I think they assume it's a choice, and something I'm doing to get out of eating junk food so that I can feel superior, or something. God, if they only knew. One remark I got this weekend that made me particularly irritated was: "well at least you get to stay skinny". Yes. I get to stay skinny. It's no work at all for me, it's just a breeze. The fact that I exercise regularly and force myself not to eat food that is JUST AS APPEALING to me as it is to everyone else has nothing to do with it. Comments like this make me so angry, but what can you do. People don't get it, and they probably never will. I can't let it get to me.

But I do. So after coming back from my cabin weekend, I had a series of work parties centered around, you guessed it, food. By this point I just didn't give a crap anymore. I figured if I was already going to feel crappy I might as well make it worthwhile. I know how bad this sounds on the surface, but if you have a food allergy, I'll bet you understand. You go so long without being able to eat the foods you love and then you end up getting sick for some silly reason - might as well go down with a piece of pizza.



So anyhow. I've just finished my last piece of cake from the work party. Work events are difficult also, but not so much as travel and vacations. I'll try to be better when I go away this weekend, if only because flying is absolutely miserable when I am coming off a gluten binge. Hopefully, I can clear some of that by the time I leave Thursday night (not likely).

In the meantime, I probably won't be able to cook until the following weekend: July 10th, although I do plan on making my grandparents some turkey stew to have around. I've got a hankering for it right now, too. Getting my grandmother to let me cook in her kitchen is something of a challenge, but I'll see if I can sell it.

I am not going to post my stats right now because I can't bear to step on a scale. It's just too discouraging. We'll resume soon enough, and I'll continue with regular menu updating in the meantime, so keep checking back. I'm still here, and I'm still working on it!

So far, the most significant and lasting behavior change of mine so far has been BREAKFAST. I eat breakfast every day now and I feel decidedly weird when I don't. Today was the first time I hadn't had breakfast in a long time.

So if you're out there, staring down a long weekend full of picnic food and BBQ festivities, dreading the food you'll eat that you think you shouldn't - I hear you. It sucks. I'm sorry. There are more of us out there than you might think, and realistically...once probably won't kill you. While you can't expect other people to understand the way you eat or the way you live, for that matter, realize that in trying to be healthy and trying to make positive changes in your own nutrition, you'll find yourself better off in the long run. Can they say the same? Probably not.

Everyone has their challenges. While I'm sitting here griping and whining about people's lack of understanding, everyone has some kind of issue like this to deal with. I'm not special. It just seems sometimes like everyone is watching you and making some kind of comment about what you're eating. Yeah, that's true, but they're doing it to everyone else, too. The larger person who is finally trying to diet or improve his or her health gets scrutinized "Diet huh? How long is it going to last this time?" The smaller person who is trying to eat healthfully or who might be recovering from an eating disorder, for all you know: "Come on, just EAT something for Chrissake!" The Jew or the Muslim who won't eat pork, the lactose intolerant person who has to pick the cheese off of everything, the vegan who has a moral issue with animal products. All of these people have perfectly valid reasons for eating the way they do and we should NOT make it our business to comment. Others will, however, and all we can do is step back and know that our reasons are our own.

Likewise, when people offer us food, they're being kind. We can always politely refuse, but we shouldn't project our lack of willpower onto them such that their courtesy is unappreciated or misinterpreted as careless. It's quite the opposite. Thinking about it that way makes me feel sort of ashamed of myself, which I suppose I deserve.

Tomorrow is another day.

A Question of Comfort

So, I'm interested to know what you (my alleged audience) think of as comfort food. For me, I find that just about anything works to comfort me. My favorites being ice cream, chocolate, popcorn, and occasionally wine and cheese. Pizza is a big one (gluten free of course).

What are your comfort foods? Are any of them healthy? I find when I have a cold that chicken soup and oranges are my go-to's.

Your comments and suggestions appreciated, please share...

My company is in the process of being audited this week, so regular updates may be more brief than usual. We'll resume detailed menu and progress feedback no later than Monday, June 29th.

Setbacks

Noooooooooooooooooooooooooooo!

Well. I deserved that. No really, I did.

Last week, I worked out once. Last night. For not very long. Friday, Saturday, Sunday, Monday, and Tuesday featured varying amounts of junk food - particularly ice cream and gluten free cookies.

Interestingly enough, I stopped taking Magnesium on Wednesday or Thursday of last week. I had been taking 400 mg between 8 PM and 10 PM, and while it was definitely curbing cravings and helping me sleep, it was doing something unfavorable to my bowels and I was feeling a little...ermm...backed up.

I've been told that sugar cravings can be curbed with a Zinc supplement, also, so I think I've come to a fairly obvious conclusion here: TAKE A MULTIVITAMIN. I'm going to try to strike a balance with the magnesium, maybe only taking 200 mg every other day.

I have a giant bottle of 8 million multiple vitamins that I bought at Coscto in late 2007 or early 2008. While the label says they should be ok, and there's some little packet of mysterious preservative substance in there with them, I'm a little hesitant. Plus, I'm willing to bet I can find a multivitamin of a higher quality than "Kirkland's Best". Not to sound snotty or anything.

So, while I am disappointed in myself, I am not discouraged. Yeah, I gained weight this week - but I know exactly why. I didn't follow the meal plans as I should have, and even when I did, I supplemented them beyond recognition with junk food. I think I just got cocky because my success in previous weeks came so easily.

I also haven't been checking on my blog as much as usual, which you may have noticed. Part of that is that I wasn't really eager to tell you how many trips I made to the vending machine on Friday, and why the spot where the Almond Hershey bars are supposed to be is empty when the rest of the machine is full. I'll try to be better about staying focused and checking in - accountability goes a long way.

So, all is not lost...and I feel great. I ran 2 miles this morning. I never run in the morning! I think I have seen the biggest improvement in my skin. I've actually gotten some comments on it, too. Like: "have you gotten sun?" (I haven't) and "you look really healthy". Cool.

SOY Confusing...

Hello friends,

This weekend was what I would call a ‘bad weekend’.

‘Kay, to put this in perspective, it was actually a GREAT weekend. I had family in visiting from out of town, I got to hold my baby niece a lot, and I went out to eat…A LOT. I worked out NEVER.

I had a lot of gluten free baked goods. Gluten free baked goods are marvelous for the wheat sensitive, but not so good from a Calorie / Glycemic Index / Nutrient Density perspective. Actually they are horrible from this perspective – let’s be honest. Take a bunch of rice and butter, and throw in some chocolate and eggs, and call it a cookie. Nine out of ten, they’re worse for your waistline than regular old glutastic baked goods.

This weekend also featured wine and ice cream and a bunch of other stuff. So in case you can’t tell – I’m laying the groundwork right now to explain why I probably will have gained weight this week. We shall see what the scale sayeth on Wednesday. I’m not going to get all worked up about it yet, I have a whole 48 hours of potentially good behavior to offset the weekend. Right? Right!

I had a bit of a funny thing happen to me the other day. In an earlier post I believe I mentioned the fact that my teeth aren’t that great, and that the trail mix I made was a challenge to chew.

Well, that may have been because I had mistaken dehydrated soybeans for dry roasted edamame. Mmmm…yes. That’s right. I had been eating soybeans that, in the words of the helpful friend who actually uncovered my error: “are intended to be rehydrated and then pressure cooked for an hour before resembling something that can be consumed.” I was eating them raw. It was like eating pebbles. I was just trying to troop it out, figuring my horrible eating habits for the first 27 years of my life had simply left me with weak teeth. The only thing I can equate this to, if you haven’t tried eating dehydrated soybeans (which I suggest you DON’T), would be eating little chunks of sidewalk.

So, let this be a lesson to you. When you are making your trail mix (which is actually quite tasty now that I know how to make it sans rock), be SURE you get dry roasted edamame. It should look like THIS:



It should NOT look like this:




DON’T GET THIS ONE. THIS ONE IS THE WRONG ONE. This one is not good. I promise. Your dentist will thank you.


So I’m on week three, and the adzuki bean casserole with dates is fantabulous, as is the breakfast bake. The breakfast bake is SUPER filling, by the way, and you can have it “on the go” so if you’re like me (rolling out of bed 20 minutes before you need to be looking reasonably human behind your desk) it’s great. And super tasty. It’s like a great big chicken oatmeal broccoli omlette. You definitely need to WATCH while it’s cooking, though, as the bulk cooking guide tells you. I peeked in at 6 minutes and it was looking good, by 8 minutes, this had happened:



Oops. It should be fine, though, just a little singed. I continue to demonstrate why IT IS IMPORTANT TO READ ALL THE COOKING TIPS. In case you didn’t get that, I’ll say again: IT IS IMPORTANT TO READ ALL THE COOKING TIPS. Get it?

Week 3 Progress Report

Ok people, I am a believer.

Much like last week, I started off this week with the best of intentions. Then life happened, hard. So this weekend I went out to dinner, I ate steak and ice cream, I didn't work out, and...well, a bunch of other stuff happened after that which I won't get into.

Long story short, I followed the meal plans pretty well, I didn't really do any late night pigging out (thanks, Magnesium)...but I definitely had plenty of treats (remember the cupcake story) and didn't really work out. I worked out twice last week. Not cool, but whatever.

Anyway, I was all ready to log in here and make a bunch of excuses, but it turns out I lost 3 freaking pounds this last week!!! Seriously y'all, the last time I lost weight this easily I had the flu. Perfectly Produce rocks. My discipline isn't great, but it still works.

Hopefully, this will be a better work-out week.

Leftover Week and Forbidden Fruit

Ok y'all, check me out:



So my shopping list this week included the following:

Greens
Kefir
Blueberries
Bananas
Apples
Honeydew melon
Pineapple
Peaches
Strawberries

And I think that's it! Somehow, despite my best efforts, Ben and Jerry did weasel their way on there at the last second. Those mothers are sneaky, ya gotta watch out.

Ok, I have to admit I was a bit skeptical when I pulled a block o' frozen tupperware out of my freezer and realized I was supposed to eat it the next day. I thought - really? How good can this stuff be when it's all defrosted and stuff?

Answer: awesome. I had the chicken and chard soup from week one at lunch today and it was as good as the day I made it. For serious. Hello awesomeness - every 2 - 3 weeks I get to do ZERO cooking. I actually might STILL have some stuff leftover at the end of this week! We'll see. For dinner I had a cilantro turkey patty and rice, with greens and pineapple. I ended up reversing the order of the apple and pineapple due to laziness and lack of preparation last night. Whatevs.

I have been taking 400 mg of magnesium between 8 and 10 PM every night and I am no longer hounded by chocolate cravings. However I do still get a hankering for sugar and for ice cream from time to time. I think that's more of a mental thing than a legitimate message from my body, though. I had the ultimate challenge this weekend, which I failed miserably:

I have been taking a 7 week long class through the University of Washington's Extension program. It's on Saturday mornings, and we had our last class this weekend. I mentioned the sugar cravings before - one of the things I love most in this world is fluffy, 100% fake, super sugary CAKE FROSTING. This is bad for the obvious reasons, but also because FROSTING usually implies CAKE which implies WHEAT. Which my intestines HATE, if you've been reading along.

Ironically, what does my instructor walk through the door with at 9:00 AM in the freaking morning? CUPCAKES. Cupcakes with MILES of frosting on top.

Friends, I felt like such a little kid at this point. I COULD NOT THINK OF ANYTHING BUT THOSE GOD FORSAKEN CUPCAKES FOR THE REST OF CLASS. Am I a freaking five year old??? I was having a war with myself. I was probably just sitting there trembling and staring off into space the whole time. We usually have a break about half way through, and I managed to resist until then. At that point I had convinced myself (get ready for this, it's a good one) I had convinced myself that it would be OK to take a cupcake and LICK THE FROSTING OFF. Good compromise, right? All sugar, no wheat? Riiight. So my friends, I confess to you I have no shame. At break time I took a cupcake and bolted for my car, and sat in my car and ate the frosting off this sad little cupcake. But of course I managed to like, knick the top of it with my teeth at which point it was ALL OVER AND I JUST ATE THE GOD DAMN THING. Uuuughhh I hate myself!

So then I drove to Starbucks, hoping that they might, just might have a gluten-free pastry that would save me from this slippery slope (cause once you have one you might as well HAVE ANOTHER). Of course the place was packed, and I only had 10 minutes or so. But lo! There behind the glass counter was an orange almond something or other that was GLUTEN FREE! Woo-hoo! I happily waited and proudly told the clerk that I would like one of THOSE, thanks so much, and...

wait for it...

Dippie McDoodlepants the barista looks at me with mock sympathy and whines "Like, sorreeee, I think we're all out, we don't HAVE any."

I almost punched her in the face. No, not really. I DID however almost point to the display pastry and say "Well then what about that one?!? Why can't I just have that one???"

::sigh:: Ladies and gentlemen, this is what happens when you don't eat breakfast. Let the record show that I DID have another cupcake, thank you VERY much, and it was delicious but disappointingly fleeting and now I can't poop.

Let that be a lesson to you.

Friday Update

'Kay folks, I'm thinking that unfortunately some gluten weaseled its way into my diet this week. The most likely suspect, since I have not hauled off and devoured any cheeseburgers or birthday cake, is the steel cut oats. I bought foreign grown oats, given that most US oats are those that are more likely to be contaminated. My guts are definitely behaving like I've fed them something I shouldn't have. Gory details include: god awful flatulence and less frequent / lower quality poo's. Darn it. Here is the brand of oats. I have been using Bob's Red Mill Gluten Free oats for the fiber mix that goes in the Perfectly Produce breakfast smoothies, with no problems. I guess everyone is different but at this point I think I will steer clear of McCann's. Bummer.

I also think I discovered a problem with raw spinach this week, which is terribly disappointing. Everytime I eat raw spinach my stomach gets really, really upset about 30 - 90 minutes later. Freakin' A. So if I have a legitimate spinach allergy, it may be that the oats are fine. I'll try them out again once my tum has time to settle down from all the excitement.

I played by the rules again on Thursday and got myself to the gym. Good stuff. No cheating. Although I did try a little experiment with the berries and cream that I recommend you DO NOT TRY AT HOME. I had a bunch of leftover cream, so I whipped it a bit and put some stevia powder in it. BLEH. Stevia powder is not good in cream. I think it needs some kind of acidity to balance it out. I don't even know how to describe the taste - it was like - if you put Equal or some other rat-poison type of fake sweetener on celery? Anyway, not recommended.

So, this week I'm attempting to skip a week of bulk cooking. My fridge and freezer are pretty full of leftovers, so I'm hoping to skate by with some greens, fruit, and vegetables to supplement. Oh, and smoothies of course. :-)


So, I'm going to attempt to tally up all this stuff in my freezer and build my own meal plan according to Perfectly Produce's example. We'll see how that goes, but I really don't think it should be that hard, since I've got both previous weeks to reference with the same foods.

Tonight, however, I am feeling a little "blah" mood wise, and it's really tempting to just order some junk or something under the patented excuse: "it's Friday". But I haven't caved yet. I gave myself a little talking to on the way home, telling myself that I would be a slack-ass loser hipocrite who would never get anywhere in life if I allowed myself to be so easily put off track, and so far that's been sufficient deterrent. The night is young. Wish me luck.

Thursday AM Update

For me, progress is it's own motivator.

Yesterday, I came as close to following the Spring - Week 2 meal plan as precisely as I ever have, though my meals were shifted forward an hour or so later than indicated (no biggie). I had zero junk food. I snacked a little between meals on raw green beans, since I over-purchased those this week. No chocolate, no candy, no nothin'. I also ran 5 miles after work, which felt good until the last 20 minutes or so, at which point my legs and feet reminded me that I'd spent the last month or so being way lazier than this.

I'm not planning on doing that every day, but still - I didn't feel hungry, I didn't feel tired, I just felt good, and ready to sleep when it was time. Ok, so it was time about an hour or an hour and a half prior to me actually turning off the light, but the season finale of Make me a Supermodel was on, so my priorities were clear.

Week 2 Progress

I woke up this morning and really didn't want to get on the scale. I was absolutely positive I would see weight gain, and maybe a lot.

I ate some salty food right before bed the night before. I have been eating chocolate and letting the midnight munchies get the better of me. I didn't even work out last night because I had a serious stomach ache, so that means I only really exercised twice last week. I know it might be silly, but I get really anxious about weighing myself because I find even the slightest bit of weight gain to be really discouraging.

But, I knew I'd made a commitment to check in according to plan, so I made myself do it. There's probably something wrong with me that I actually get physically anxious when I step on the scale, but whatever.

Anyway, my dear friends, it turns out I actually LOST almost a full pound from last week. SAY WHAT? Seriously! I think it's real, too, not just a fluke. You ladies in the audience know that water retention can throw things off pretty significantly depending on the time of the month, but if anything I would have expected that to work against me this week, too. So, color me happy, and more committed to following the meal plans. If I can lose weight without even trying (hello, the last time that happened I think I had the flu), imagine if I actually did everything right? Worked out 5 days a week and made myself go to bed at a reasonable hour instead of eating late at night? Umm, yeah.

Other updates - I have noticed that I seem to function better on the same or less amount of sleep. I am absolutely a converted believer in breakfast, now. My mornings are a lot less painful. I still have trouble getting out of bed, but once I do (and once I have breakfast) I feel really good. I don't feel like I NEED that morning cup of coffee. I still like to have it, but I actually feel like I could do without it if I wanted to cut out caffeine. I might think about this in the future but hey, one thing at a time. I will actually be late to work in order to accomodate breakfast.

I am less hungry. Really. I can focus better because I feel more...solid, I guess is the word. A couple of times this week I have felt bloated and heavy, due probably to massive fiber intake, but only a couple times. Usually, about an hour before a scheduled meal I get a little asterisk above my head that reminds me I'm supposed to eat soon. I can handle that.

My fingernails still suck, but that's nothing new. I have trouble with cystic acne from time to time, and I think I have seen a slighly quicker heal time on breakouts. I'd have to pay more attention to this to really verify.

It's easier for me to drink more water. I don't really feel hugely thirsty, but I don't have to make so much effort to get an appropriate amount of water. Maybe it's just more appealing not to have to drink it on an empty stomach.

TOILET TALK WARNING: I am WAY regular, if you know what I mean. Like, ALWAYS once, usually twice a day regular. It's, like, impressive.

All said and done, I'm very impressed after just a week of eating right. Not even all the way right, but a good solid base of healthy food with some junk added in. It makes me really eager to see what happens when I get the late night eating thing conquered and start hitting the gym consistently!

Week 2 Cooking

Week two’s cooking felt like it took about half as long as week one’s session. In reality I think it was about five hours, start to finish. I think that’s because I’ve got the flow of the recipes and ingredients down – oh yeah, and my garlic peeling time went from approximately five million hours down to about five minutes with the knife blade trick. If you are following the Perfectly Produce plan, READ ALL THE NOTES AND TIPS, they are there for a reason and they actually work! Promise.

Check out my Goulash, y’all! Doesn’t it look super yummy? It lives up to the picture and then some. Note that I used pearl quinoa as opposed to other varieties. I’m not sure what all other varieties exist, but apparently there are some options here. I grabbed what I could find on the shelf at QFC and that worked fine.

I haven’t tried the soup yet but that’s on the menu tonight! I’m excited to actually ingest the Okra of which there has been so much talk. So…The occasional chunk of corn that you see here is actually a mistake. I read the recipe too quickly and added yellow onions, but thought I was also supposed to add yellow corn. I pulled most of it out after I dumped it in and realized my mistake, just because I think that would throw the carbs off if I left much more of it in there.

For those of you who have not cooked brown basmati rice before, you are in for a treat. It SMELLS so good. I’ve never taken notice of the smell of rice before, but I wanted to eat this stuff just plain after smelling it. Weird, but good. Oh, and rosemary can join the Happy Nose club along with cilantro and dill. You know, you walk into bakeries and ice cream shops and stuff and you’re tempted by good smells, but they’re usually FAKE good smells, and there’s really only one or two varieties of the super good baked good / waffle cone odor. I am impressed by the diversity and complexity of smells I have encountered thus far using natural ingredients and fresh herbs that I have never really dealt with before. I’m reading this and realizing that I sound like a dog or something, what with all the emphasis on smells, but it’s one of those things that strikes you when you’re not used to it.


Think about it – your food SHOULD smell good. Have you ever gone through the drive through at a burger joint, only to find that your car REEKS for DAYS afterward, just from the greasy bag being in it for a few minutes? Think about that for a minute – that is SO gross and disgusting. Whatever was in that bag should not have been ingested by humans, certainly not as a primary diet staple. Don’t get me wrong, I’ll never stop loving (or eating) fast food French fries – occasionally. Occasionally would be the key.

So far this week, the only thing that I’ve had any trouble with was the apple maple greek yogurt breakfast thing. It’s super good, don’t get me wrong – but I think I portioned it out wrong, or didn’t use the right amount of yogurt. I used about 6 ounces of greek yogurt to make the dressing, but then I had some leftover yogh's sitting in my fridge (2 little cups of 6 oz each). I’m wondering if I should have used 6 cups? I don’t know. Anyway, I got two breakfasts out of the main dish and then threw a yoghurt cup on the side, so I’m thinking that should work.

The white bean avocado salad is way more filling than you might think, and really tasty. I find my stomach sometimes gets upset when too much raw spinach is in a recipe, so if that’s true for you too you might want to add a little more oil. That usually works for me.

Tomorrow I am due to weigh in which I’m not really too eager about – I think I will see some more gain. Not at all unexpected though, I only worked out 3 days last week and they weren’t very strenuous sessions. Also, I have not been disciplined in the Late Night Munchies department, though I have gotten some advice that Magnesium Glycinate a couple hours after dinner should help with this. Sorry about the link source, I had a little trouble quickly finding a neutral reference to link to on this. Anyway, I just got some today and will give it ago tonight.